what i don’t think anyone has mentioned is that maybe it would be a good idea to see a psychiatrist… “He’s hacked into my WiFi and cross wires also so none of my conversations via texting with other men or my girlfriends make much sense” one among several sentences that lend one to suspect the problem may be more complicated (internal) than having to do with actions of another person. Best of luck
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@jwwagner25 could you clarify what you meant, one sentence in particular lead you to comment, the problem may be internal ? Not entirely sure what your insinuating.
@LonnieM. Hi, Sim-jacked… I will look into that aspect of it definitely, I will call my cell company and ask those questions. I can honestly say though, I am pretty certain that’s not how it’s being done. In a period of 3+ years I’ve gone through 4 cell phone companies , I’m sure it’s more than a Sim he’s using to do this. I’ve been in contact with 2 of the 4 companies before and never been told it was. I think the problem is much deeper and more intricate than this surface stuff. There’s to much, for to long.
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@fromo1946, Hi! Great answer! I’ve done the research of hiring someone to come in and do a sweep of the place… it’s not cheap (my only dilemma) single mom, lots of financial priorities for us come first. Even though this is a major priority, one of peace of mind and safety, I still need to be able to pay my bills and rent, and provide food , etc… hope you get the idea. These companies aren’t cheap, was pretty blown away when I asked them what they charged for a 950 sq ft apartment! 
anyways, I still believe this is the best option to be done. Best answer yet. Thank you!
So many replies I cannot read them all to know if this has been said already. I know folks have talked about the seriousness of stalking and after read your OP I know you understand that.
Here are a couple practical suggestions, but I apologize if someone has already said these things.
If he has gotten into your Wifi one of the first things I would do is get a password manager. I use Lastpass and swear by it. It stores much more than just passwords. It also makes random very secure passwords. Which it can store. I would have it or another password manager create a long password using upper/lower case letters, numbers and symbols. If I was being stocked I would have make a password that is no less than 30 characters long up to about 65 characters long. Then save it in last pass from which you can copy and paste it anytime you need to log into your router. I have different passwords for every site or system I have to log into because Lastpass remember them all for me. Plus if they are a website or online application it automatically fills in my user name and password for me.
Each state has different ways of dealing with these things. Not know where you live I will tell you what you can do in California. First speak the Sheriff or Police Department that has jurisdiction. If they refuse to do anything speak to the County District Attorney, If they do nothing speak the County Grand Jury, and if they do nothing Speak to the State Attorney General’s Office.
If you have an attorney speak to them as well and ask for advice on what to do. Also speak to WEAVE or other organization who works with victims of abuse.
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I will add that security takes some money. So, it may be viable to also start a lawsuit to get payment for the moves (the 1st one, and perhaps yet another one), and a professionally installed security system.
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once again, if the network system is hacked, this is all moot as this conversation has been observed.
BUT The network needs to addressed, 1st and foremost if you are being cyberstalked.
As I have stated before, you need to learn how to administer your network.
Once you can do that, you need to remove all devices 1 at a time from the network and re-add them.
Document the mac addresses.
You will learn that IF you are being stalked via hardware, what that suspect device mac address is.
Obviously then, you block it after you do a router factory reset.
Then change login/password access from router default, disconnect all wifi and hardwired devices, re-add singly, allow those devices permission and whitelist mac addresses.
Blacklist the suspect macs.
Then it is up to you to change locks, update RO, etc.
Hardware can be addressed in a couple of hours and give you great peace of mind, plus having learned how to administer your LAN, add a level of security and confidence in your own self protection.
Take action, this thread has been going on 3-4 days, you could have done this 6 times over by now.
If you are uncomfortable doing this yourself IO suggest you hire and IT consultant to evaluate your situation and an attorney. Doing this on your own is foolish. There are professionals who specialize in this kind of problem and they can lock you down. Yes, you need to change all of your locks as well.
Cameras give you proof, a gun gives you protection (as long as you get some training). Or at least some kind of defense tool, be it a gun, tazer, dog… if this guy is willing to go hundreds of miles to mess with you then who knows how far he will take it.
Unfortunately when someone is in fear, rightfully or otherwise it’s very easy to think of all sorts of things that could be happening from the WiFi hacking to the cellphone cloning, etc, etc. I’m sure it’s especially easy to suspect some of these things when the person that’s living in fear also lacks the technical knowledge to check and verify or rule things out because they can’t really be done in the way they think.
To the original poster, I really do wish you some peace of mind and hope you can get someone knowledgeable to check things for you and not only help you get secure, but hopefully rule out some of your suspicions with your devices.
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She has repeatedly stated she has limited means and a family to keep afloat all the while dealing with his.
I find it ridiculous how many think you need an “expert”
this is not a job for a security expert, it is a job for a tech savvy high schooler.
Reach out to the HS advisors or the local community college for help finding a capable person.
my 12 yr old can lock the network down and authenticate every device in about 2 hours.
20 minutes if using a bash script.
Nor is it a job for a specialist lawyer, go to the local womens support channels, survivors network, etc, they will have resources to steer you towards for additional help navigating the processes.
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you need to have the right kind of battery to do this or you’re setting yourself up for a fire…
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I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this. I know from experience it can be extremely stressful. One thing I haven’t seen addressed is the general ages of your children, and whether they have house keys he could be copying, and knowingly or not, divulging passwords and log in information to him. He doesn’t sound as if he should have contact with them, but of course, the legal system doesn’t always see it that way. With finances being a concern, you can not only check into domestic violence support services near you, but also look into low income or sliding scale legal services. I don’t know where you’re located, but hopefully there will be some local resources that are available. In some areas, if you are the victim of a crime, there are resources that will help you relocate, set up a new household, so perhaps those funds could be used to help secure your household if you choose to stay there. I believe the district attorney’s or attorney general’s offices would handle that.
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Have you sought help from the court system through a court order not to be near you as well as order him to anger management class? There are also laws against harassing, stalking and communicating threats. Take a concealed carry class as well to learn how to protect yourself. It’s a shame that your ex can’t handle himself in an adult-like manner. Best wishes.
Call your cell phone company ask for a new number/sim card.
change the locks.
do a spyware scan etc and or reformat pc change all passwords long +hard stuff he would not know.
next notify cops and court get another ro. document all this with the cops .
change keys, make sure he’s not on your rental agreement and not able to get lanlord to give him a key .
router reset it change password tape over reset button and after all is changed hide it.
change all account passwords look for something plugged into your keyboard port he may be useing a keylogger to record text etc.
if not sure unplugg keyboard use usb one and lock it up unplugged when not in use.
don’t click on links as some remote access software can be remote installed with the silent flag turned on and look like a normal link if he’s sneaky has this amount of time easy to find and or some bucks to a script kiddie and they can do it.
only allow the kids to talk with him via video with you there he could use the kids to install stuff.
while the one person here made the comment that it may be an issue with yourself/state of mind.
document it all with pictures and give to cops.
let the kids know that he is not to come over and come in unless you are there and you say so.
another way he may get in while your not there.
change the locks bank stuff etc and keep on you. if you loose any of that info call and change it asap.
it’s sad to say but if he’s like this he will try and use the kids to get what he wants.
hide the camera in plain site in some thing no one would look in.
if you are not techie get a local computer store to check out the pc /router in their shop.
get a spyware scan and a reinstall . ask them to unplug all items from back of the pc and get a new usb keyboard and mouse get rid of the others . don’t let your kids plugin a usb drive you didn’t give them and keep at home in a locked area.
Agree about ESET. Been with them for 25 years, starting when they were the only ones who could fix an infection. Have been 100% satisfied ever since.
More recently with Malwarebytes, but I’ve been 100% satisfied with them, too.
So yeah, get ESET’s a/v protection and Malwarebytes. They’re well worth the (relatively minor) costs, IMO.
The first thing I’d do is buy a gun. Then take a course of how to use it. There is no substitute for defending yourself. The cops are minutes if not hours away. Change the password on your wifi router and keep on changing it until he gets tired of hacking it. It’s not difficult to do.
It’s extremely easy (too easy, IMO) to get a protection order, at least in my state. If there is any evidence that he’s been anywhere near you or your home, much less in it, they’ll find and arrest him. I also know another woman who got very suspicious about all her electronic devices to the point of it taking on a life of its own (paranoia). A lot of time, tears, and money was wasted trying to chase down ghosts and it was questionable how many of her devices were actually compromised. You can spend thousands having your home swept for electronic bugs. Or you can buy a device off Amazon for under $100 and attempt do this yourself. I would also suggest reading several of the articles posted by DHS.
Maybe your neighbors would let you put a cam or two in their window watching your house. And have it hooked up to their WiFi. And tell no-one.
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I read through most of the comments and have a few additional suggestions, both low and high tech. I’m keeping cost in mind. 1. He may be reading these conversations (or future ones) so make sure name and location are no where near the truth. 2. Use the old “put a ribbon in-between the door and door frame when you leave”. So you can see if it was moved. 3. Lay down some plastic wrap/news paper, etc… And sprinkle flour on it when you are leaving during a period that you really think he may be likey to stop by. You’ll be able to see foot prints if he’s not paying attention, but hopefully it’s more of an additional deterrent. 4. The camera should be your best friend. Hopefully the above steps mentioned by other users puts your mind at ease with being able to prove that someone is or is not getting into the apartment. 5. Lastly, I don’t know what type of door you have at home but they make additional hardware that you slide in the door to make it impossible to unlock from the outside. I’ll try to post a link in another post because I’m unsure if it’s allowed. Also search Amazon for a “doorstop alarm”. It’s like the old wedge door stops but with an alarm that goes off if the door hits it.
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